It is rare to find a film that emotionally engages me. It could be because I'm a narcissistic sociopath with no soul to speak of but I'm pretty sure it's because most films churned out by Story Corp. are shallow machinations aimed at making a quick buck which wouldn't be so bad if they still managed to emotionally engage me in something other than sheer contempt for the human race and the film industry. Would it have killed someone to make the Transformers movies something more than a joke about how people will watch anything as long as you insult their intelligence while flashing deafening explosions in their face? Would it have killed James Cameron to come up with an actual plot for Avatar instead of emotionally manipulating the audience with sociopolitical agendas? Would it have killed George Lucas to actually come up with a story for the Star Wars prequels? I ask these questions because it apparently didn't kill director Josh Trank and writer Max Landis, relative newcomers to the film making foray I might add, when they made the film of this review: Chronicle.
When I saw the trailers for this movie I thought to myself: Another found footage movie, just great! The last found footage movie I ever saw was Apollo 18 and it was a piece of shit! Plus this movie's about kids with superpowers. Another superhero movie? Is that all Hollywood cranks out when not crapping out terrible remakes of obscure TV shows like 21 Jump Street (And yes by now it's obscure I didn't know about it and I'm a television addict!). It was bad enough when they were remaking shit we recognized but now this?
To cut a long, insane, thought short, I really didn't think much of this movie. Found footage movies don't work unless they're titled Paranormal Activity, superhero movies have long since passed their expiration date (I haven't seen Captain America or Thor, that's how sick of them I am. I'm not saying they're bad movies, I'm saying I prefer a little variety to my movies), and teen movies piss me off because when was the last teen movie since the Breakfast Club that actually was worth a damn and not full of stereotypes? (So much for cutting a long, insane, thought short!)
However, tonight I just finished watching this film and I have to say it is, so far, one of the best films of the year. The story isn't anything new, it's actually very familiar, yet still manages to feel more original than any movie that was adapted from a Hasbro toy line. What makes this film stand out is how engaging the characters are. They're not stereotypes, they are people with depth and emotions, people you'd actually like in real life (for the most part), and when something happens to them you feel for them and care. This is rare to find in a mainstream film these days. Most other movies I'm wishing the protagonists get killed because that's all I care about seeing by the time the second half of the movie starts because the characters aren't people I'm emotionally invested in, they're just potential fodder to the lackluster film I just paid seven bucks for (if I'm not seeing it in 3-D, which I never do, or in IMAX, which I reserve for Chris Nolan films). But with Chronicle you care and you feel like it's seven bucks well spent (and it is worth it to see this film at full price, I highly recommend it).
To being the non-spoilerish portion of the review I will start with a basic synopsis of the film. Chronicle is about three teenage boys who discover a mysterious object in the forest that grants them telekinetic powers. The boys are: Andrew (played by Dane DeHaan) a reclusive boy who hides behind a camera due to his abusive father and rough high school life, Matt (played by Alex Russell) Andrew's cousin who likes to quote philosophers and is Andrew's only friend, and Steve (played by Michael B. Jordan) a popular student running for class president and somewhat friend of Matt's at the beginning of the film. The three of them discover a strange object buried underground that grants them powers beyond their wildest dreams. You've seen most of the antics they engage in already in the trailers as they play with their abilities by playing pranks on people. However, over the course of the film they develop a strong friendship whilst developing their powers which they soon realize come with great responsibility.
Chronicle isn't about these kids learning to become superheroes, this isn't a superhero movie, it's a tragic tale of a friendship dashed by hardship and corrupting power. If you're looking for a feel-good movie this isn't it. If you are looking for a movie that will engage you emotionally and keep you engaged from beginning to end, then this movie is right up your alley.
Getting into more spoilerish territory I'll move onto the best part about this movie.
The best part about this movie are the three central characters who are played by brilliant young actors. You can't help but love these characters because they are believable, realistic, and have depth to them. This is the first movie in a long time where I actually remember the characters' names. DeHaan performance as Andrew is gripping as his character crackles with intense power fueled by all his repressed emotions. You feel sorry for this kid as he's struggling with an abusive father and sick mother at home while facing the hardships of high school. Russell gives a heartwarming and heartbreaking performance as Andrew's cousin Matt who serves as a sort of "leader" of the group, admittedly Matt is the weakest of the three characters but nonetheless he plays a pivotal role as the moral compass of the group. However, my favorite is undoubtedly Michael B. Jordan, who plays Steve, who really warms up to Andrew and tries to help him come out of his shell. There isn't a single scene where Jordan doesn't come off as charismatic and loveable as Steve. Undoubtedly, he and Andrew form a more tighter bond than with Matt as there are more scenes where both Steve and Andrew discuss things like Andrew's tendency to distance himself through his camera and how Andrew could be more open socially. This fact makes Steve's death later in the film that much more powerful and unlike every other death I've ever seen in a recent film I too felt the loss. My jaw literally dropped to the ground in the theater when the film cuts to Steve's funeral. (To note, the only other time this happened was when I saw Gandalf die in the first Lord of The Rings). You get to know these kids and grow to understand, like, and relate to them. This is because, regardless of the fact that this is a movie about kids with superpowers, this movie feels real (in a way no amount of 3D can recreate).
This is where the found footage aspect manages to help the film, in making what's taking place seem real. The style is used at its best when the boys are playing pranks using their powers. Who wouldn't be playing pranks like this if they could move things with their minds? And who wouldn't want to film it all? I would be posting that crap on youtube every day if I could. This is a logical step teenaged boys would take when they find out they have superpowers, what anybody would do if they had superpowers. Adding to this is the very real emotions that the boys have when they're just hanging out together. They feel like normal kids just chilling together, the only difference is that they're hanging out about a thousand feet in the air. In turn, you begin to develop an attachment to these characters, and that's what makes this movie shine.
Regardless of the fact that every and all shots are "found footage" from Andrew's cameras to the camera the police put inside Andrew's hospital room for "investigative purposes," which detracts from the realism a bit, you manage to stay focused on the story of these friends as their lives spiral out of control. Ironically, like every found footage movie ever made, the style not only helps the film but weakens it as well. All because it's difficult, even in an age where camera phones are in almost every person's pocket, to justify the presence of a camera. Take the aforementioned hosptial scene near the end of the film, the lack of a proper camera in Andrew's hosptial room requires the silly "hand wavy" explanation for a random camera in the room via a "police investigation." This is exacerbated by the resulting scene captured on the camera where Andrew's abusive father attempts to hit his severely injured son in the wake of his wife's death. This makes no sense because people act differently when they know they're being watched, and Andrew's father knew about the camera because the police told him about it. He wouldn't have struck Andrew if the plot hadn't required it. However, I digress, this is only a minor flaw in an otherwise damn good movie. Even the usual justification for cameras, Andrew's coping mechanism, is a better excuse than the usual "somebody has to document this" bullshit. The film is much more deft at justifying cameras for the most part.
The story is simple for the most part. Like I said before the strongest aspect are the characters but that doesn't translate into bad story. It's a tragedy about a group of boys who forge a friendship due to their being bestowed incredible powers which ultimately gets destroyed by Andrew as his repressed feelings brought on by his abusive father and unlucky social life culminate into a rampage that not only costs the life of Steve but Andrew's as well. Andrew isn't even the antagonist, in fact he is more of a tragic protagonist. What happens to him is just a result of his hardships in life and, combined with his almost godlike powers, it drives him to his downfall. To be honest I don't feel like divulging it completely because if you haven't seen the movie you shouldn't be spoiling it for yourself. Go see it. It's worth the money to see it full price. I deserves your money unlike most other films.
Ironically, I couldn't help but notice how Chronicle was like how the Star Wars prequels should've been like. Andrew is a person living a hard life who is granted great power that he eventually abuses which leads him to the dark side. Unlike the prequels, however, Chronicle manages to make the downfall dramatic and engaging.
In conclusion I give Chronicle five floating baseballs out of five for it's emotionally engaging story, memorable trio of characters, and excellent use of the found footage technique regardless of a few minor issues in logic.
Showing posts with label science fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label science fiction. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Sunday, September 4, 2011
"The Dark Side of The Moon" A review of Apollo 18
So after bumping back the release date a few times, Apollo 18 finally comes to theaters. I was very much excited to see this film when I heard about it. I love anything concerning space travel and the Apollo program, so when I heard there would be a horror movie set during the "secret" Apollo 18 mission in the found footage style ala Paranormal Activity I was on board. So now it's finally out and this is what I thought of it.
There are some major SPOILERS ahead mind you.
To start things off I feel I must point out the fact that I am actually a fan of the Paranormal Activity films. While some have pointed out very credible flaws like the characters aren't all that interesting or annoying, that isn't why I like the films. It's simply about the fact that what the film shows is otherworldly and very unnerving. I am not a heavily spiritual person, I don't believe in ghosts, nor demons for that matter. However that doesn't make the very idea of them any less creepy. Regardless of my beliefs I would never fuck with a Ouija board, because EVERYONE knows that's a bad idea (unless you live in a horror movie). It is that deep seated instinct to fear the unknown that the PA films inspire in me, and in effect grip me in the albeit lacking storyline.
It's the same fear I feel when I watch documentaries of alien encounters (when nothing else is on mind you, I'm not that fanatical) because in the end what is transpiring is so strange and truly "beyond this world" that you can't help but get chills down your spine.
This is what attracted me to Apollo 18, not because it was in the same genre of "found footage horror" but because of the potential fear that the film could've inspired in me.
However this isn't the case, sadly. While the film does succeed in generating a very unnerving atmosphere thanks to its setting it never truly jumps on the opportunity to touch the primal fears we all have. However it doesn't fail completely to deliver on a decent if not cliched plot. The story of the doomed astronauts as they uncover the truth behind the strange incidents on the surface of the moon has some interesting little twists, though nothing genuinely mindblowing (Spoiler: the aliens are moonrocks!!!)
The cast if fairly solid, Ryan Robbins of Stargate Atlantis and Sanctuary fame was a welcome sight as John the Command Module Pilot. However the two primary protagonists in the lunar lander, Ben (Warren Christie) and Nate (Lloyd Owen) are actually rather likable even though most of their material is Apollo technobable and stereotypical fear reactions (the obvious ones being "The government lied to us!" and *scream*). The film's characters suffer from a lack of audience connection as we jump straight to the moon with only a few minutes of post launch banter to build a relationship with the characters. It's one of few flaws in this movie.
One thing I really liked about the film was its fairly accurate presentation of Apollo missions (though I should tell you I am not an expert on the subject). Needless to say, I like the fact that this is all filmed in a way to emulate the style of most reels from the space program during the time. However this also turns out to be the films one major problem. This is because while I don't mind the style or genre or whatever you want to call it, this shouldn't be a found footage film. Had this been an ordinary horror film that used conventional filming this film would've been ten times better (and it would've made more sense, more on that later). While the documentary shots and still camera shots from within and outside the LEM help convey the claustrophobia of the setting, conventional filming could've done that and convey the complete emptiness of the moon (which is ultimately untrue when you realize what's living there). The film does try to do that with some ridiculous attempts at having vista shots and convenient cameras being placed all around in places they wouldn't have cameras. All of which really don't make sense but are necessary to operate within the confines of the style while still having film to work with. This is where Apollo 18 both thrives and withers.
Bear in mind that it is nigh impossible to make a found footage flick "cinematic." Unless the person using the camera is actually a trained cameraman in the story it's more likely that you will be watching the camerawork of every crap youtube video for the next hour and a half. Needless to say, Apollo 18 definitely struggled to keep the illusion that all of this insanity is being recorded all the way through by a myriad of cameras. That's where we find the biggest plot hole that effectively kills the plot. Which is astounding to me, never once in my life have I seen a plot hole that actually killed a movie, and it all hinges on the fact that this is a found footage movie.
This plot hole is encountered in the climax of the movie, after Ben and Nate are forced to abandon the LEM because a delirious Nate, in a fit of alien fever, went on a hammer spree. Before ditching the lander Ben announces that he will gather all the film from the cameras to take back with them (the film we are watching). After crashing their rover on the way to the abandoned Russian lunar lander and losing Nate in a crater full of moon monsters Ben hikes the rest of the way to the Russian lander. He manages to get it working and makes his way back to the command module. The strange fact that there is a camera set within the ABANDONED RUSSIAN LUNAR LANDER (and it's fixed to the wall mind you, you know this because the camera doesn't tumble about in zero gravity as the ship makes it into orbit) is a bit of a stretch however this isn't the plot hole I'm talking about. That happens after you realize that Ben is indeed infected by the alien disease like Nate and is also surrounded by killer moon rocks which levitate into view thanks to the zero gravity. In a fit of insanity, as well as screaming his head off because a bunch of killer moon crabs are eating his face, Ben neglects to put on the brakes and smashes into the command module effectively killing John the CM pilot, himself, and the film all in one go!
You see if there was no return trip to earth how the hell did this footage get to earth? How did it get leaked and subsequently edited into a feature length film?
And since this film is all about "Why we never went back to the moon" it's safe to say there was no 19th mission to recover said footage. So perhaps it would've been better if this were a normal moon monster movie.
There are some major SPOILERS ahead mind you.
To start things off I feel I must point out the fact that I am actually a fan of the Paranormal Activity films. While some have pointed out very credible flaws like the characters aren't all that interesting or annoying, that isn't why I like the films. It's simply about the fact that what the film shows is otherworldly and very unnerving. I am not a heavily spiritual person, I don't believe in ghosts, nor demons for that matter. However that doesn't make the very idea of them any less creepy. Regardless of my beliefs I would never fuck with a Ouija board, because EVERYONE knows that's a bad idea (unless you live in a horror movie). It is that deep seated instinct to fear the unknown that the PA films inspire in me, and in effect grip me in the albeit lacking storyline.
It's the same fear I feel when I watch documentaries of alien encounters (when nothing else is on mind you, I'm not that fanatical) because in the end what is transpiring is so strange and truly "beyond this world" that you can't help but get chills down your spine.
This is what attracted me to Apollo 18, not because it was in the same genre of "found footage horror" but because of the potential fear that the film could've inspired in me.
However this isn't the case, sadly. While the film does succeed in generating a very unnerving atmosphere thanks to its setting it never truly jumps on the opportunity to touch the primal fears we all have. However it doesn't fail completely to deliver on a decent if not cliched plot. The story of the doomed astronauts as they uncover the truth behind the strange incidents on the surface of the moon has some interesting little twists, though nothing genuinely mindblowing (Spoiler: the aliens are moonrocks!!!)
The cast if fairly solid, Ryan Robbins of Stargate Atlantis and Sanctuary fame was a welcome sight as John the Command Module Pilot. However the two primary protagonists in the lunar lander, Ben (Warren Christie) and Nate (Lloyd Owen) are actually rather likable even though most of their material is Apollo technobable and stereotypical fear reactions (the obvious ones being "The government lied to us!" and *scream*). The film's characters suffer from a lack of audience connection as we jump straight to the moon with only a few minutes of post launch banter to build a relationship with the characters. It's one of few flaws in this movie.
One thing I really liked about the film was its fairly accurate presentation of Apollo missions (though I should tell you I am not an expert on the subject). Needless to say, I like the fact that this is all filmed in a way to emulate the style of most reels from the space program during the time. However this also turns out to be the films one major problem. This is because while I don't mind the style or genre or whatever you want to call it, this shouldn't be a found footage film. Had this been an ordinary horror film that used conventional filming this film would've been ten times better (and it would've made more sense, more on that later). While the documentary shots and still camera shots from within and outside the LEM help convey the claustrophobia of the setting, conventional filming could've done that and convey the complete emptiness of the moon (which is ultimately untrue when you realize what's living there). The film does try to do that with some ridiculous attempts at having vista shots and convenient cameras being placed all around in places they wouldn't have cameras. All of which really don't make sense but are necessary to operate within the confines of the style while still having film to work with. This is where Apollo 18 both thrives and withers.
Bear in mind that it is nigh impossible to make a found footage flick "cinematic." Unless the person using the camera is actually a trained cameraman in the story it's more likely that you will be watching the camerawork of every crap youtube video for the next hour and a half. Needless to say, Apollo 18 definitely struggled to keep the illusion that all of this insanity is being recorded all the way through by a myriad of cameras. That's where we find the biggest plot hole that effectively kills the plot. Which is astounding to me, never once in my life have I seen a plot hole that actually killed a movie, and it all hinges on the fact that this is a found footage movie.
This plot hole is encountered in the climax of the movie, after Ben and Nate are forced to abandon the LEM because a delirious Nate, in a fit of alien fever, went on a hammer spree. Before ditching the lander Ben announces that he will gather all the film from the cameras to take back with them (the film we are watching). After crashing their rover on the way to the abandoned Russian lunar lander and losing Nate in a crater full of moon monsters Ben hikes the rest of the way to the Russian lander. He manages to get it working and makes his way back to the command module. The strange fact that there is a camera set within the ABANDONED RUSSIAN LUNAR LANDER (and it's fixed to the wall mind you, you know this because the camera doesn't tumble about in zero gravity as the ship makes it into orbit) is a bit of a stretch however this isn't the plot hole I'm talking about. That happens after you realize that Ben is indeed infected by the alien disease like Nate and is also surrounded by killer moon rocks which levitate into view thanks to the zero gravity. In a fit of insanity, as well as screaming his head off because a bunch of killer moon crabs are eating his face, Ben neglects to put on the brakes and smashes into the command module effectively killing John the CM pilot, himself, and the film all in one go!
You see if there was no return trip to earth how the hell did this footage get to earth? How did it get leaked and subsequently edited into a feature length film?
And since this film is all about "Why we never went back to the moon" it's safe to say there was no 19th mission to recover said footage. So perhaps it would've been better if this were a normal moon monster movie.
Which brings us to the monsters in question. Of what I can say about the creatures in the film, I will say that they are probably the best possible creatures to have live on the moon. The process by which the filmmakers went about coming up with the creatures was surprisingly smart. Had this been done by someone else we probably would've ended up getting some sort of slimy creature like in any other movie, but then I wouldn't buy that as an actual lunar creature. When you think of what's on the moon you think rocks, and that's exactly what the aliens in the film are: they're moon rocks or they look like rocks. While we never really get to see some of the bigger ones clearly (only in small cuts in grainy film reel) they come in many shapes and sizes. To be honest they reminded me of the rock crabs that Jack Sparrow met in Davy Jones Locker in the third Pirates movie, however they're much more menacing when they're space-moon-crabs.
As for scares in the movie, well there aren't that many. The movie relies too heavily on the fact that all of this is being filmed by the astronauts. So you get a lot of first person shots from inside of a dark crater with only brief flashes of clarity and when they happen you now they're resorting to the sickeningly overused jump scare. The only thing the film had working was the overall tense, claustrophobic, isolated atmosphere, however they never utilize it to its fullest.
Needless to say, the movie is another sad story of a film with plenty of potential but not ambition to rise above the usual found footage horror movie tropes. Not that it was bad, it's definitely better than say Conan The Barbarian as you actually like the characters to some degree. It was merely OK. Do I suggest you watch it? Only if you really really like the Apollo program, the Moon, conspiracies, and Ryan Robbins floating around in a tin can for 5 minutes. So it was enough for me to like at least.
I give Apollo 18, 3 killer moon crabs out of 5.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Top 10 Most Memorable Robots (In My Opinion)
I, like many other nerds in the world, have always dreamed of having a robot for a friend (and sometimes a lover, however this isn't going to the THAT kind of list!). It's a dream that robotics experts have been trying to realize ever since the original Star Wars came out. However, the closest thing to a robot buddy people can get these days is a roomba and they suck (literally and figuratively) at social interaction. However, in the world of fiction, there are countless robots that have become iconic for their general lovable personalities. Today, I feel like sharing the list of robots I find the most memorable. It's all mostly my opinion and I'm sure that everyone has their own most favorite robot, this is merely my perspective. If you feel so inclined, go ahead and share with us your own favorite robot.
Now for the list:
Honorable Mention: Stargate Universe's Kino
Technically SGU's Kino isn't a robot and more like a remote controlled camera drone. However, I couldn't help but point out that there seems to be a rogue Kino floating about on the Destiny that likes to spy on unsuspecting crew members. Such as in the select few Kino Episodes online where they don't realize it's watching them. The most notable being when Lt. James finds it watching her undressing. Why I mention it is because I feel no one is actually piloting it (I'd hate to think Eli is really that creepy) and that it's just a bit of a voyeuristic little eyebot. I think it's lovable regardless of its rather creepy habit because hey, it's a floating camera that makes a cute little chittering noise when it flies around that likes spying on people.
No. 10: Number "Johnny" Five From Short Circuit
The film may have been a bit of a turd (the sequel no doubt was) and a blatant cash in on the success of ET however, in retrospect, who didn't find the lost robot No. 5 slightly endearing when he wasn't screaming about being disassembled. His is a tale like that of Marry Shelly's Frankenstein: in that a creation of man is given life through the power of lightning (though in most cases lightning tends to do the exact opposite of that in every other situation). Bestowed with a new found self-awareness and a hunger for understanding the strange new world around him, No. 5 ends up befriending animal lover Stephanie while evading stereotypical bad military guy. I like him mostly for the fond nostalgia he brings me, though I always liked how he reprogrammed those other three robots to act like the three stooges.
No. 9: That Robot Arm Thing From Iron Man
Before inheriting his father's business empire, Tony Stark was already showing everyone how impossibly smart he was when he built a robot arm with an artificial intelligence. In the film we see he won an award for creating it, and it is his first choice for an assistant until he realizes what a bumbling buffoon it really is. This robot arm seems to fail at the very tasks robot arms were developed for in the first place: it struggles to help Tony with major surgery (causing Tony to call Pepper down to help him instead), it douses him with a fire extinguisher when there's no fire, and actually gets in the way of helping Tony build the Iron Man suit. So basically it's a billion dollar paperweight. However, regardless of how utterly useless it seems to be, it ends up saving Tony Stark in the end of the first film. And who doesn't love a little character arc like that?
No. 8: Marvin from The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
As a fan of both Douglas Adam's books and the most recent film adaptation starring Iron Man 2's (heh what a coincidence!) Sam Rockwell as Zaphod Beeblebrox I couldn't have a list of memorable robots without mentioning Marvin the depressed robot. Voiced in the movie by the one guy I always thought fit the role perfectly (Alan Rickman). Marvin is probably one of the most memorable characters in the Hitchhikers books. His overall pessimistic outlook on everything from how big his head is to his belief that the ship's computer hates him is enough to make anyone feel sorry for the guy-bot. Of course, robots with odd personality quirks have always tended to stick in people's memories better than their well-adjusted counterparts which brings us to...
No. 7: HK-47 from Bioware's Star Wars: Knights of The Old Republic
The original Star Wars KOTOR game is probably one of the best games I ever played (a list for another time I suppose) and it also happens to have one of the most maladjusted robots to ever come into creation. HK-47 is an assassin bot with a pre-programmed loathing of every form of organic life, "meatbags" as he humorously calls them, and a propensity to "accidentally" get his owners killed. Through a series of rather unfortunate events, HK-47 is handed to a number of unscrupulous characters who end up getting killed for some unfortunate reason or another until he is unwittingly reunited with his original master and creator Darth Revan (the player character). His opinions on love "is making a shot to the knees of a target a hundred and twenty kilometers away..." and his inability to understand how organic meatbags keep sane with "all the constant sloshing" of their meaty organs is lovably evil and sadistic. He has been such a lovably devious character it's hard not to draw comparisons between him and another robot on our list. (See the No. 2 Spot).
No. 6: Kryten from Red Dwarf
Whenever a Red Dwarf fan talks about Kryten, it's most likely the Robert Llewellyn incarnation of the character (not to say David Ross' Kryten is bad). On the cult sci-fi sit-com, Kryten becomes a regular character during season three and quickly became a welcome addition to the cast. A neurotic mechanoid built with a love for household chores from cleaning to laundry, Kryten also served as the crew's resident science officer. He continued to grow as a character thanks to David Lister's attempts to "break his programming" to make him more independent and did manage to find a semblance of freedom from it, though he still liked to conduct his usual duties after all of this. It's safe to say that if you're going to be trapped 3 million years into deep space, you couldn't have a better robot friend than Kryten to keep you company (even after you've become nothing but a skeleton in clothes and wigs).
No 5: Wall-E from Pixar's Wall-E
The titular character of this touching tale about love, space, and going green. Wall-E is probably one of the most lovable robots on this list. A small garbage compactor on wheels with a personality that developed over 700 years of isolation with no one but a cockroach for company. Wall-E discovers love when a new robot, Eve, literally falls out of the sky. He is driven to win her over throughout the rest of the film, crossing the entire universe and saving mankind in the process (talk about a high maintenance girl!). His bumbling personality and passion for old musicals make him an endearing character that has become one of the most iconic robotic figures in recent history.
No. 4: EVE from Wall-E
Speaking of Wall-E we can't forget the other memorable robot protagonist from the film: EVE. EVE has all the hallmarks of a kickass heroine such as a strong determination to do her job, a giant plasma cannon, and a weakness for vibrant plants and dancing. EVE can very well be placed on a list for most badass heroines among the likes of Sarah Connor and Ellen Ripley. Throughout the film she is constantly brushing away Wall-E's advances on her in a number of ways, including shooting him with her big ass plasma cannon that I mentioned before. To put it simply: EVE is a fucking badass. The fact that she ended up falling for the equivalent of a charming garbage man is both vexing and endearing at the same time.
No. 3: R2-D2 from Star Wars
What list of memorable robots would be complete without R2-D2? When not trying to ignore C-3P0's whining R2 is off being MacGuyver on rollerskates. He can hack doors, fix spaceship hyperdrives, and can make one hell of a Tatooine Martini. An unsung hero of the Star Wars universe, R2 is always pulling the actual "heroes" out of danger, and does it while putting his own shiny metal ass on the line.
No. 2: Bender from Futurama
Remember that robot I mentioned when taking about HK-47? This is the one I was talking about. Bender is a cantankerous bucket of bolts who has also been known to call humans "meatbags." While he always dreams of killing all humans (like most other robots in this show it seems) he has a soft spot for the ones he calls his friends, usually putting himself at odds with his robot counterparts as a result. This alcohol powered bending unit makes it to number two because of his propensity for pickpocketing and partying while telling everyone to "Bite my shiny metal ass!"
No. 1: Gir from Invader Zim
The number one spot goes to my favorite robot, the insane robot Gir from Invader Zim. Given to the Irken invader Zim in the first episode as his robot slave, Gir quickly wormed into the hearts of many for his simple minded personality, love of food (especially tacos), and his hilarious antics on the show. From willingly jumping into a kidnapper's burlap sack when ordered to attack, to emptying out his rocket fuel to make room for tuna, Gir is always up to something that results in causing trouble for Zim. He has become such a popular robot that, even though the show's been cancelled for many years, there are still tons of merchandise with his tin can face on it. If that's not memorable, I don't know what is.
Now for the list:
Honorable Mention: Stargate Universe's Kino
Technically SGU's Kino isn't a robot and more like a remote controlled camera drone. However, I couldn't help but point out that there seems to be a rogue Kino floating about on the Destiny that likes to spy on unsuspecting crew members. Such as in the select few Kino Episodes online where they don't realize it's watching them. The most notable being when Lt. James finds it watching her undressing. Why I mention it is because I feel no one is actually piloting it (I'd hate to think Eli is really that creepy) and that it's just a bit of a voyeuristic little eyebot. I think it's lovable regardless of its rather creepy habit because hey, it's a floating camera that makes a cute little chittering noise when it flies around that likes spying on people.
No. 10: Number "Johnny" Five From Short Circuit
The film may have been a bit of a turd (the sequel no doubt was) and a blatant cash in on the success of ET however, in retrospect, who didn't find the lost robot No. 5 slightly endearing when he wasn't screaming about being disassembled. His is a tale like that of Marry Shelly's Frankenstein: in that a creation of man is given life through the power of lightning (though in most cases lightning tends to do the exact opposite of that in every other situation). Bestowed with a new found self-awareness and a hunger for understanding the strange new world around him, No. 5 ends up befriending animal lover Stephanie while evading stereotypical bad military guy. I like him mostly for the fond nostalgia he brings me, though I always liked how he reprogrammed those other three robots to act like the three stooges.
No. 9: That Robot Arm Thing From Iron Man
Before inheriting his father's business empire, Tony Stark was already showing everyone how impossibly smart he was when he built a robot arm with an artificial intelligence. In the film we see he won an award for creating it, and it is his first choice for an assistant until he realizes what a bumbling buffoon it really is. This robot arm seems to fail at the very tasks robot arms were developed for in the first place: it struggles to help Tony with major surgery (causing Tony to call Pepper down to help him instead), it douses him with a fire extinguisher when there's no fire, and actually gets in the way of helping Tony build the Iron Man suit. So basically it's a billion dollar paperweight. However, regardless of how utterly useless it seems to be, it ends up saving Tony Stark in the end of the first film. And who doesn't love a little character arc like that?
No. 8: Marvin from The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
As a fan of both Douglas Adam's books and the most recent film adaptation starring Iron Man 2's (heh what a coincidence!) Sam Rockwell as Zaphod Beeblebrox I couldn't have a list of memorable robots without mentioning Marvin the depressed robot. Voiced in the movie by the one guy I always thought fit the role perfectly (Alan Rickman). Marvin is probably one of the most memorable characters in the Hitchhikers books. His overall pessimistic outlook on everything from how big his head is to his belief that the ship's computer hates him is enough to make anyone feel sorry for the guy-bot. Of course, robots with odd personality quirks have always tended to stick in people's memories better than their well-adjusted counterparts which brings us to...
No. 7: HK-47 from Bioware's Star Wars: Knights of The Old Republic
The original Star Wars KOTOR game is probably one of the best games I ever played (a list for another time I suppose) and it also happens to have one of the most maladjusted robots to ever come into creation. HK-47 is an assassin bot with a pre-programmed loathing of every form of organic life, "meatbags" as he humorously calls them, and a propensity to "accidentally" get his owners killed. Through a series of rather unfortunate events, HK-47 is handed to a number of unscrupulous characters who end up getting killed for some unfortunate reason or another until he is unwittingly reunited with his original master and creator Darth Revan (the player character). His opinions on love "is making a shot to the knees of a target a hundred and twenty kilometers away..." and his inability to understand how organic meatbags keep sane with "all the constant sloshing" of their meaty organs is lovably evil and sadistic. He has been such a lovably devious character it's hard not to draw comparisons between him and another robot on our list. (See the No. 2 Spot).
No. 6: Kryten from Red Dwarf
Whenever a Red Dwarf fan talks about Kryten, it's most likely the Robert Llewellyn incarnation of the character (not to say David Ross' Kryten is bad). On the cult sci-fi sit-com, Kryten becomes a regular character during season three and quickly became a welcome addition to the cast. A neurotic mechanoid built with a love for household chores from cleaning to laundry, Kryten also served as the crew's resident science officer. He continued to grow as a character thanks to David Lister's attempts to "break his programming" to make him more independent and did manage to find a semblance of freedom from it, though he still liked to conduct his usual duties after all of this. It's safe to say that if you're going to be trapped 3 million years into deep space, you couldn't have a better robot friend than Kryten to keep you company (even after you've become nothing but a skeleton in clothes and wigs).
No 5: Wall-E from Pixar's Wall-E
The titular character of this touching tale about love, space, and going green. Wall-E is probably one of the most lovable robots on this list. A small garbage compactor on wheels with a personality that developed over 700 years of isolation with no one but a cockroach for company. Wall-E discovers love when a new robot, Eve, literally falls out of the sky. He is driven to win her over throughout the rest of the film, crossing the entire universe and saving mankind in the process (talk about a high maintenance girl!). His bumbling personality and passion for old musicals make him an endearing character that has become one of the most iconic robotic figures in recent history.
No. 4: EVE from Wall-E
Speaking of Wall-E we can't forget the other memorable robot protagonist from the film: EVE. EVE has all the hallmarks of a kickass heroine such as a strong determination to do her job, a giant plasma cannon, and a weakness for vibrant plants and dancing. EVE can very well be placed on a list for most badass heroines among the likes of Sarah Connor and Ellen Ripley. Throughout the film she is constantly brushing away Wall-E's advances on her in a number of ways, including shooting him with her big ass plasma cannon that I mentioned before. To put it simply: EVE is a fucking badass. The fact that she ended up falling for the equivalent of a charming garbage man is both vexing and endearing at the same time.
No. 3: R2-D2 from Star Wars
What list of memorable robots would be complete without R2-D2? When not trying to ignore C-3P0's whining R2 is off being MacGuyver on rollerskates. He can hack doors, fix spaceship hyperdrives, and can make one hell of a Tatooine Martini. An unsung hero of the Star Wars universe, R2 is always pulling the actual "heroes" out of danger, and does it while putting his own shiny metal ass on the line.
No. 2: Bender from Futurama
Remember that robot I mentioned when taking about HK-47? This is the one I was talking about. Bender is a cantankerous bucket of bolts who has also been known to call humans "meatbags." While he always dreams of killing all humans (like most other robots in this show it seems) he has a soft spot for the ones he calls his friends, usually putting himself at odds with his robot counterparts as a result. This alcohol powered bending unit makes it to number two because of his propensity for pickpocketing and partying while telling everyone to "Bite my shiny metal ass!"
No. 1: Gir from Invader Zim
The number one spot goes to my favorite robot, the insane robot Gir from Invader Zim. Given to the Irken invader Zim in the first episode as his robot slave, Gir quickly wormed into the hearts of many for his simple minded personality, love of food (especially tacos), and his hilarious antics on the show. From willingly jumping into a kidnapper's burlap sack when ordered to attack, to emptying out his rocket fuel to make room for tuna, Gir is always up to something that results in causing trouble for Zim. He has become such a popular robot that, even though the show's been cancelled for many years, there are still tons of merchandise with his tin can face on it. If that's not memorable, I don't know what is.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
A Dark Age For Stargate Fans Is Fastly Approaching
We all know by now about the news that any possibility of Stargate returning any time soon is a very distant dream. In fact I've been seeing a lot of sites that are pretty much throwing in the towel when it comes to saving SGU or the films and are now praying to the master of reviving old science fiction franchises: JJ Abrams to "Star Trek" the Stargate franchise as soon as humanly possible. Brad Wright himself has said that "Somebody smart from MGM is going to figure it out, and something will happen."
As to whether or not there is actually any person at MGM who is smarter than a single-celled organism has yet to be confirmed, considering what a ginormous clusterf*ck the studio has been in.
While I still retain an iota of hope that we will see the stargate spin once again, I am afraid it won't spin on either the Destiny or Atlantis. The idea of "Star Trek-ing" the Stargate franchise pretty much scares the crap out of me as much as it excites me. I love Abrams' reboot of the original Star Trek, but do we really want to see someone like Chris Pine step into the boots of Jack O'Neill?
I bet he'd look like this throughout the entire film. Totally what you'd expect in a military leader...
Of course it's a gross hyperbole, but we all know that if MGM did go the "Star Trek" route we'd be getting something like this. We'd probably get a little cameo from maybe Amanda Tapping because she has boobies and because she'd be the one passing on the torch like Nimoy did in Star Trek. I might sound pessimistic but come on, the Star Trek film was aimed at a wide audience and not just us geeks, but the mindless masses, and let's face it, the masses don't care about the Destiny's mission unless the message in the background radiation was a fart joke.
Unless the Stargate team manages to pull a rabbit out of their ass like Joss Whedon did for the Firefly franchise we're up shit creek without a paddle and cuts on our hands.
I may sound really bleak, considering I said I still hold some hope for the Stargate franchise, but it's the kind of hope you really don't rely on. It is only due to the fact that popular shows like Red Dwarf, which has just been given a new season on Dave, after years of inactivity and the failed attempt to make a feature length film (sound familiar?) have returned to the small screen.
After all, Wright did say the franchise isn't dead, after all, the Stargate franchise can be rather profitable, but that's the issue, it will be profit, not the desire to continue a story, that will persuade MGM to greenlight anything with the title Stargate on it.
The only possible route I believe could be a viable way to please the fans would be to have a Stargate mini-series that encompasses all three series' stories.
Wright had been trying to get a film off the ground that would've done such a thing, but of course it was shot down faster than Mitchell's F-302. However, Syfy still likes putting up mini-series like Tin Man and Neverland, as well as Reise: Kingdom Falling, a mini-series that had alot of Stargate alumni working on it. A mini-series that ties up all the loose ends left behind by Atlantis and SGU (can we really say SG-1 has any loose ends to tie up apart from Jack finally hooking up with Carter?) would be a dream come true.
Alas, I'm more likely to find closure in my own twisted drug induced dreams.
It's a sad fact that alot of us don't want to see but, it's a fact nonetheless. Stargate is dead for the forseeable future. And with only shows like Sanctuary and Eureka keeping the sci-fi fans tuning into the ever growing idiocracy that is Syfy, it is a very dark day to be a Stargate fan.
When will we see the this baby spin again? Only time will tell...
As to whether or not there is actually any person at MGM who is smarter than a single-celled organism has yet to be confirmed, considering what a ginormous clusterf*ck the studio has been in.
While I still retain an iota of hope that we will see the stargate spin once again, I am afraid it won't spin on either the Destiny or Atlantis. The idea of "Star Trek-ing" the Stargate franchise pretty much scares the crap out of me as much as it excites me. I love Abrams' reboot of the original Star Trek, but do we really want to see someone like Chris Pine step into the boots of Jack O'Neill?
I bet he'd look like this throughout the entire film. Totally what you'd expect in a military leader...
Of course it's a gross hyperbole, but we all know that if MGM did go the "Star Trek" route we'd be getting something like this. We'd probably get a little cameo from maybe Amanda Tapping because she has boobies and because she'd be the one passing on the torch like Nimoy did in Star Trek. I might sound pessimistic but come on, the Star Trek film was aimed at a wide audience and not just us geeks, but the mindless masses, and let's face it, the masses don't care about the Destiny's mission unless the message in the background radiation was a fart joke.
Unless the Stargate team manages to pull a rabbit out of their ass like Joss Whedon did for the Firefly franchise we're up shit creek without a paddle and cuts on our hands.
I may sound really bleak, considering I said I still hold some hope for the Stargate franchise, but it's the kind of hope you really don't rely on. It is only due to the fact that popular shows like Red Dwarf, which has just been given a new season on Dave, after years of inactivity and the failed attempt to make a feature length film (sound familiar?) have returned to the small screen.
After all, Wright did say the franchise isn't dead, after all, the Stargate franchise can be rather profitable, but that's the issue, it will be profit, not the desire to continue a story, that will persuade MGM to greenlight anything with the title Stargate on it.
The only possible route I believe could be a viable way to please the fans would be to have a Stargate mini-series that encompasses all three series' stories.
Wright had been trying to get a film off the ground that would've done such a thing, but of course it was shot down faster than Mitchell's F-302. However, Syfy still likes putting up mini-series like Tin Man and Neverland, as well as Reise: Kingdom Falling, a mini-series that had alot of Stargate alumni working on it. A mini-series that ties up all the loose ends left behind by Atlantis and SGU (can we really say SG-1 has any loose ends to tie up apart from Jack finally hooking up with Carter?) would be a dream come true.
Alas, I'm more likely to find closure in my own twisted drug induced dreams.
It's a sad fact that alot of us don't want to see but, it's a fact nonetheless. Stargate is dead for the forseeable future. And with only shows like Sanctuary and Eureka keeping the sci-fi fans tuning into the ever growing idiocracy that is Syfy, it is a very dark day to be a Stargate fan.
When will we see the this baby spin again? Only time will tell...
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Apollo 18 Trailer Analysis.
To start things off, I want to direct you to the trailer so if you haven't seen it you can and understand what I'm about to talk about...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VA2pPv4T2YE
Now that you have...
Holy shit does this film look awesome!
Some might see it as a very cheap looking film, but you shouldn't be threatened by this because the film is utilizing the "found footage" style that has been popularized by The Blair Witch Project and Paranormal Activity. What makes it different is that this is found footage from the 70's, thus the quality is that of typical documentary footage people see of the Apollo missions. Which is a good thing in my opinion. The fact that the filmmakers are aiming for a realistic look when it comes to the set and the footage itself is a very good sign.
So, to start things off, I'd like to take a look at the two people who we will be sharing the cramped conditions of the lunar lander for the duration of the film. In an earlier overview of the film I did last year I had said that there were two possibilities as to whom we'd be watching A. The members of the original crew slated to be on Apollo 18 before it was cancelled and B. A secret crew we didn't know about. Considering the fact that this movie is being called a "conspiracy thriller" in some sites, it seems like B is the more likely scenario. This is proven by the fact that in the trailer one of the astronaughts is named "Banes" or "Haines" I think it's Baines. And since there was no Baines on the official list for the mission in real life it's now a certainty that this is a secret crew. Baines is the poor soul who we see get infected by the alien pathogen in the trailer. The other astronaught isn't named in the trailer. These two astronaughts seem to be your run of the mill horror movie protagonists. As to whether or not we will care about them is still up in the air. But what they find on the moon might just be more interesting.
Skipping ahead to the segments of the trailer where we see what looks like a camera being dragged off into the shadows on the surface of the moon and the instance where our heroes find footprints moving AWAY from their landing site are all hints that something otherworldly is going on. It's obvious the creature stalking them is an alien, it's even shown in the trailer crawling around in Baine's helmet before it infects him. However, what is more interesting is what they also find along with alien monsters.
Footage from the trailer hints that there were other people on the moon before Apollo 18. We see one of our heroes pick up a broken helmet buried in the lunar soil along with some bodies. Who are they? Judging by the lander that is shown near the end of the trailer I'd say it was a Russian team of cosmonaughts who went to the moon before the start of the film. What were they doing before they were killed by the alien is yet to be known, however this twist (even though it's spoiled in the trailer) is rather interesting.
From a critic's standpoint I am still ambivalent as to whether I should be excited for this film. It does look like "Paranormal Activity: In Space!" However, it doesn't mean it's going to be bad. The sci-fi horror fan in me is hoping for something atkin to Alien meets Paranormal Activity. The cramped feeling of the lunar lander interior definitely gives viewers a sense of claustrophobia as they are crammed in with our heroes. Plus it looks like Baines goes nuts halfway through the film and tries to commit suicide by breaking the lunar lander's windows, killing our unknown astronaught as well. Interesting stuff, with the potential to get truly suspenseful the longer they're on the moon.
So here's what I expect this movie's going to seem like:
Act 1: Shows our three astronaughts (Baines, the Lunar Module Co-Pilot, and the Command Module Pilot) on their way to the moon where we are treated to some character development to make us care. They land on the moon and do some routine procedures and take some footage.
Act 2 is when things start to turn south. Strange things creeping about the lander and split second shots of stuff roaming around the motion activated cameras. They discover the remains of the Russian team. The alien knocks out their communications with the command module and thus the rest of the world. Bains gets infected by an alien and begins to go insane.
Act 3 has our unknown astronaught being forced to either incapacitate or kill Bains in self defense but not before he damages the lunar module irreparably. The last astronaught is forced to use the Russian lander to call for help and possibly find a way to get back to the CM. However the alien gets to him before he is able to get to the lander.
Whether or not it will be like this is up in the air. We can only hope it will be a terrifying "alien-esque" like film with some good moments of intense suspense.
Until then, keep a watchful eye on this one. It could be worth watching
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VA2pPv4T2YE
Now that you have...
Holy shit does this film look awesome!
Some might see it as a very cheap looking film, but you shouldn't be threatened by this because the film is utilizing the "found footage" style that has been popularized by The Blair Witch Project and Paranormal Activity. What makes it different is that this is found footage from the 70's, thus the quality is that of typical documentary footage people see of the Apollo missions. Which is a good thing in my opinion. The fact that the filmmakers are aiming for a realistic look when it comes to the set and the footage itself is a very good sign.
So, to start things off, I'd like to take a look at the two people who we will be sharing the cramped conditions of the lunar lander for the duration of the film. In an earlier overview of the film I did last year I had said that there were two possibilities as to whom we'd be watching A. The members of the original crew slated to be on Apollo 18 before it was cancelled and B. A secret crew we didn't know about. Considering the fact that this movie is being called a "conspiracy thriller" in some sites, it seems like B is the more likely scenario. This is proven by the fact that in the trailer one of the astronaughts is named "Banes" or "Haines" I think it's Baines. And since there was no Baines on the official list for the mission in real life it's now a certainty that this is a secret crew. Baines is the poor soul who we see get infected by the alien pathogen in the trailer. The other astronaught isn't named in the trailer. These two astronaughts seem to be your run of the mill horror movie protagonists. As to whether or not we will care about them is still up in the air. But what they find on the moon might just be more interesting.
Skipping ahead to the segments of the trailer where we see what looks like a camera being dragged off into the shadows on the surface of the moon and the instance where our heroes find footprints moving AWAY from their landing site are all hints that something otherworldly is going on. It's obvious the creature stalking them is an alien, it's even shown in the trailer crawling around in Baine's helmet before it infects him. However, what is more interesting is what they also find along with alien monsters.
Footage from the trailer hints that there were other people on the moon before Apollo 18. We see one of our heroes pick up a broken helmet buried in the lunar soil along with some bodies. Who are they? Judging by the lander that is shown near the end of the trailer I'd say it was a Russian team of cosmonaughts who went to the moon before the start of the film. What were they doing before they were killed by the alien is yet to be known, however this twist (even though it's spoiled in the trailer) is rather interesting.
From a critic's standpoint I am still ambivalent as to whether I should be excited for this film. It does look like "Paranormal Activity: In Space!" However, it doesn't mean it's going to be bad. The sci-fi horror fan in me is hoping for something atkin to Alien meets Paranormal Activity. The cramped feeling of the lunar lander interior definitely gives viewers a sense of claustrophobia as they are crammed in with our heroes. Plus it looks like Baines goes nuts halfway through the film and tries to commit suicide by breaking the lunar lander's windows, killing our unknown astronaught as well. Interesting stuff, with the potential to get truly suspenseful the longer they're on the moon.
So here's what I expect this movie's going to seem like:
Act 1: Shows our three astronaughts (Baines, the Lunar Module Co-Pilot, and the Command Module Pilot) on their way to the moon where we are treated to some character development to make us care. They land on the moon and do some routine procedures and take some footage.
Act 2 is when things start to turn south. Strange things creeping about the lander and split second shots of stuff roaming around the motion activated cameras. They discover the remains of the Russian team. The alien knocks out their communications with the command module and thus the rest of the world. Bains gets infected by an alien and begins to go insane.
Act 3 has our unknown astronaught being forced to either incapacitate or kill Bains in self defense but not before he damages the lunar module irreparably. The last astronaught is forced to use the Russian lander to call for help and possibly find a way to get back to the CM. However the alien gets to him before he is able to get to the lander.
Whether or not it will be like this is up in the air. We can only hope it will be a terrifying "alien-esque" like film with some good moments of intense suspense.
Until then, keep a watchful eye on this one. It could be worth watching
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